I did a share today at a meeting and the theme was One Day at a Time. This was a new format for me and, as always, it was incredible. No matter what is shared from the top table One Day at a Time is the absolute mantra we should all adhere to.
As usual I shared a little about my drinking history, my rock bottom and now my recovery. I have been lucky enough not to have a relapse (yet) but that is 100% down to AA and going to meetings. My coping mechanism for everything good or bad is alcohol and no matter what my background is I am sure that I was born an alcoholic.
In my 1070 days of sobriety I have learned so much, I no longer feel lonely and am more than happy to spend time on my own. I have now come to realise that the materialistic trappings of life are just not for me, I was using them as a disguise. Also I accept that if I am not good enough for someone then that is up to them, not because of my failing.
My world is so much smaller these days and a lot quieter and in this I am now a lot more content. This period of life is giving me the opportunity to appreciate what I have instead of constantly wanting more. I don’t need the quick fix and by getting to this point I now feel more like me that I have ever in my life.
I am learning that I don’t need to have loads of friends but I know I have a few who are amazing and I can turn to at any time. They are not at my disposal but are honest and care and that is what true friendship is.
I guess that this is what they call a Spiritual Awakening and if it is then bring it on as it feels great. I will caveat that I do know that this will soon pass as life has a habit of throwing in curve balls but I think I am ready to deal with them, One Day at a Time of course.