We will remember them….

poppiesI am sat this morning watching the service at the Cenotaph with pride, as an ex Royal Navy WRNS.  I do admire the commitment of the ex service people, as well as the pride and gratitude.  It is so important that we remember the lengths these people, over the years, have gone for our freedom.  Without them who knows what our world would look like now.

Why is it then that so many of us live in a pool of self-pity and feeling hard done to.  I do appreciate that there is a lot of poverty out there but I have to say that most alcoholics I have met, including myself, have a roof over their head and are in relatively good health.  Although I lost my marriage we still have a good relationship for the sake of the kids, I have a roof over my head, running water and food on the table.  How lucky am I.

Even at this difficult time in my life I live in country with the best health care in the world, that is (by all extents and purposes) free.  There is a benefits system that has been more than support of my needs and even my mortgage company has gone over and above to help me.  So why then do we always feel the need to do a verbal disservice to everything we have.

I guess most of it for me was about control, fear and insecurity.  Now I am winning these battles then I am learning to see the good over the bad.  By accepting the teaching of the Twelve Steps I can re-train my brain to accept that everything is going to be ok.

We live in a world now where the pace of life is exhausting.  People in their 40’s now have the highest rate of burnout of any generation before and with this more and more social pressures are on us to look a certain way, live a certain way and work a certain way.  I feel for all of this and have spent most of my life trying to be something I am not.  This year I definitely hit burn out!  It wasnt pretty and was incredibly painful.

At the time people would tell me “You’ll be stronger for it” god that was so annoying!! But you know what they are right.  I have learned the biggest lesson in my life that I could every learn – its ok to be, cause I’m ok.

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